.Thursday, December 22, 2005 ; 3:58 AM -
.His Mercy is New everY mornInG.
You know..sometimes I wish I can find a place where I can call my own, where I know I can return to anytime I want. Hmm..no not my home in Indo but a small cosy place here where warmth and love are waiting (that means a special someone is waiting). The urge to go home is stronger these days. Maybe I should. Just a random thought.
Past week has been rather eventful especially yesterday night. Many are discovered and surprises keep on coming. But, that's rather sad if that's the only way you found our more about someone. Another random thought. As I mentioned, yesterday was eventful. We had a Christmas dinner. Turkey, ham, pasta, peach crumbles, white and red wine. Cozy and fun dinner. The preparation was rather tiring though. I was torn between choir practise and going holland v to buy food stuff. In the end, I didnt attend the last practise. Everything seems to do a good job in irritating me. It took me a 1000 words essay to cool down. If I have time I'll upload the entry.
Anyway, everyone was late. Even us the hosts are late. Fashionably late I must say. Deb was around yesterday. I'm really glad she's around to listen to my confession on crazy things I have done for this past week. Her jaw just dropped when I told her about that thing. Well, I guess I have not learn my old lesson. Anyway, i got a yellow pillow as christmas present and a cute snoopy pouch from deb and a small rasperberry filled thing from hazel.
It's amazing how brain works with the memory. I remembered exactly the date and place and maybe time of events happened at this time last year. As I recalled and re-tell the story to a friend, a smile was always on my face. My friend said, I was very brave and steadfast in standing by the decision I made. Well, I have too. There's no other way. The past and present are different. No doubt the past was deeper and bittersweet. The present is rather grey and uncertain. But, when a tiny envelope symbol flashed on my phone screen, I got that little fluttering effect in my stomach. It dawned to me that I haven't been feeling this for sometimes and I miss it. Why do human allowed themselves being in the same situation over and over again knowing perfectly well that things will have the same ending?It's a cruel yet bittersweet vicious cycle. In the end, a lesson learned and we grow up..the hard way.
